Heading for a Problem

By Marilyn Marks

Despite the well-known advice to offer your hand for sniffing when saying hello to a dog, I can’t tell you how many people still pat the dog on the head. 
You know how you feel when you are grabbed by your great-aunt and smooched as your check is pinched?  That’s what the dog must feel like when we pat their head – smothered, overpowered.  Now, we don’t feel seriously threatened by old aunt Ethel, just a bit disgusted is all.  But to a dog, multiply that by 100 or something, because top of the head and shoulders say "threat" to them instinctively. 
Here’s why I think people do it:  1) without thinking – the dog’s head is right next to their hand; 2) to avoid the tongue or teeth – if we present for sniffing we make ourselves open to wet noses, slobbery tongues and the off chance the we’re putting our hand in a cave of knives.  Subconsciously, these are things we want to avoid, especially young kids; 3) we forget – We pet so many dogs without worrying, we forget that one amongst them might not like it (intermittent reinforcement).   It doesn’t deserve a number, but I think some people do it because they actually DO want to show the dog who’s in control (subconsciously).
The folk knowledge advising a slow, non-threatening approach was no doubt gained with a few mistakes along the way, which you can avoid.   Ask owners for permission to pet BEFORE sticking your hand out.  If there is no owner, DO NOT approach.  Avoid standing directly in front of the dog, toes-to-paws.  Instead, "open up" the space by standing slightly off to an angle (shoulder-to-paw or muzzle).  Avoid bending over the dog – your face coming down towards him is even more threatening than your hand! 
Let the dog decide when and for how long to sniff your hand.  Don’t get involved with petting even if the dog lingers near your hand or nuzzles you for petting, as some dogs invite you to give more than they actually feel comfortable with.  Familiarize yourself with other signs of friendliness (tail even with back or below, wagging, lifted paw, "soft" eyes, relaxed ears) or wariness (panting, averting gaze, sniffing the ground, yawning, pacing, freezing, large bug-eyes). 
Often when children go to pet the dog on the head, the dog moves his muzzle up to sniff, which makes the child bounce their hand higher, which makes the dog jump up to get it (to sniff), which makes the child scream……   Teach kids to stand still and offer a hand at the dog’s nose-level (after asking the owner’s permission).  A good way to do this is to make a wall of your legs so they can’t back away and steady them with one hand on the shoulder and one to guide their hand to be sniffed.
If you are a dog owner, you can train your dog to accept human greetings in an acceptable way.  You can teach your dog to sniff hands as a greeting gesture which helps eliminate jumping up.  You can also desensitize your dog to oncoming pats on the head, just for those few who still don’t get it.